The Mission Trip Begins!

Joshua 1:9  "This is my command -- Be strong and courageous!  Do not be afraid or discouraged.  For the Lord your God is with you where ever you go."

It has been just over a week since I heard the judge pound the gavel pronouncing my sentence.  It was a very difficult court appearance, as they wanted to make sure they could fill me full of shame for what I had done.  My attorney warned me that the sentencing would be the worst part.  Now I understand why.  I am grateful for all the people who sacrificed their tie to be there with me.  It meant so much to me that you were there to be with my family.  I am glad that this part is over so I can move on to doing my time and beginning my "missions trip" as a free man with no shame.

I have sat through many church services where a missionary stands up and tells their story.  They show pictures of the airplane they boarded, or perhaps they showed a "loaded" U-haul trailer behind a sagging station wagon (pre- mini-van days).  Everyone hugs each other and waves good bye.  It is my guess they are feeling apprehension, excitement and sadness for leaving behind family and friends.  Either way, they are off on a new adventure to serve God in a place far away from home.

My missions trip started out much different than this usual picture.  I did not feel excited, but rather, fear and apprehension.  My hugs were done before the hearing started.  I even received a "Commissioning", where everyone laid hands on me in prayer.  There is nothing more encouraging than this!  I was at my weakest point and these Brothers and Sisters in Christ were there to pray for me while I faced my judgement from the courts.

Promptly after the hearing, I was met by two U.S. Marshals who escorted me off to another room where I was prepared for transport.  There were no planes or U-hauls...just a window-less cargo van with fiberglass seats.  I had no idea where I was going.  It was a mystery ride that came to an end at Sauk County Jail in Baraboo.  I had to ask where I was, because there was no "welcome banner" waiting for me.

I would imagine that most missionaries are provided with some training before they go off to serve.  They probably study the culture, learn about the economy, local customs and take language courses before they begin the trip.  I tried to do this but everything I learned could not have prepared me for this experience.  This is something you have to learn as you go, but you must learn quickly!  First I needed to be "de-programmed" of Freedom.  Spending 24 hours in a 6 x 10 foot room with nothing but a Bible, blanket, camera and flickering fluorescent light that never goes dark, is a good way to begin.

Now that I was sleep-deprived and learned how to dress like the locals, it was time to enter the general population.  The guards loaded me up with my supplies and walked me to my new community.  My heart was pounding outside of my chest when the heavy sliding door opened.  I saw a group of men all dressed like me.  Their focus changed from watching TV and playing cards to studying ME, the new guy who was being escorted to his new cell.  This was an extremely intimidating feeling for a guy who does not have any street savvy.  This is my first stop on the missions trip.  My "cell-y" was quick to offer support to me by telling me about the rules of the block.  Without his help I would have been lost! He was a wonderful guide.  We had some long conversations after lights-out -- the irony being there is ALWAYS a light left on.

This block had 24 cells and 48 bunks.  It was about half full.  The cells were on two floors with an open walkway or deck that was used for walking.  27 trips = 1 mile.  Below, on the main floor was the other bank of cells.  In the center of this area was a carpeted area with stainless steel picnic tables and some plastic lawn chairs.  There is a 27-inch flat screen mounted high up on the center post, which many inmates "worshipped".  After all, why wouldn't they?  They had a good selection of cable channels.  They called this the "day room", but it was more like a great room.

I decided to go out and mingle.  I started by studying the bulletin board.  It did not take long for guys to start walking up to me and offering advice and pointing out more rules.  I know they were sizing me up, but I was doing the same to them.  The next several days, I had some good conversations.  I heard many stories which I took with a grain of salt.  The vocabulary included a few words that were used as adjectives, nouns, and verbs -- all in one sentence.  I think there was a competition to see how many times you could use these words.  I had to remind myself that it would be a bad idea to laugh at this.  I simply chose not to engage in the competition.

As I studied this community, I wondered what I should be doing?  Do I stand up on the table and start preaching?  Yes, that actually came to mine.  However, I quickly decided that may not be the best approach.  I decided I would continue learning more about my new community.

One morning I heard an announcement over the loud speaker that a Bible Study was about to begin.  I must admit, I hesitated to get up and walk over tot he door, as this would identify me as one of those Bible Thumpers!  I put away that fear and stepped up to join the guys at the door.  We met in a conference room with an elderly gentleman named, Pastor Frank.  It was not a 'deep' study, but it was good to read the Bible and pray together.  The next day, these guys invited me to a daily group devotional.  They meet at the entrance to our cell, since you cannot have "visitors" inside your cell.  These men had a desire to know God more, but they still used strong prison language.  This is so common to them that it is their 'normal'.  The important thing is that they are seeking God.  We also met at the end of the day on the upper deck and thanked God for another day done.  Then we headed to our own cells for lock down.

I am so encouraged to find other Christ-followers.  I am even more encouraged that I am clearly identified with them in the block.  Perhaps this will open more doors for me to talk about Jesus.  I pray that I will have courage and boldness when prompted by the Holy Spirit.

I make sure that I am spending time in prayer too.  This is difficult to do when you can't find a quiet place to be alone.  I am working on my ability to stay in an "attitude of prayer".  Always looking for opportunities to engage conversation.  I make a point to bow my head in prayer at each meal and thank God for the meal and the men around me.

Just as I was getting to know the system and build relationships at Sauk Co., I was moved to a new jail in Portage.  I was frustrated when they woke me up and told me they were moving me, but I am sure God has a plan for me.  The marshals brought a "nicer" van with windows this time!!  As we left the jail, I saw that there was a Dairy Queen right outside our pod!!  (What I would have given for a DQ Burger!!! -- even though I'm lactose intolerant!!!)  And it has only been a week.....

We were delivered to Columbia County Jail.  It seems that this is a "bus stop" for the Federal Transport bus.  I don't know when they will move me next.  It could be this week or two months from now.  I am simply kept in the dark while I wait.

So now, I start over.  This is a smaller pod and we are the older, 'wise' inmates.  The pods on either side of us have younger guys who have more to prove.  Every now and then, we hear the guards rushing over to them and taking someone to the hole.

The Christ-followers are few here.  Just me and perhaps my neighbor.  We have had some good conversation over coffee and he loaned me one of his Joyce Meyer books to read.  He has been here for 5 months preparing for a jury trial.  Since he has been here the longest, we call him the "Pod Father".

I also attended the Bible Study here today.  It was just me and a young man from the Huber block.  We met with Chaplin Grahm and talked about the importance of Forgiveness.  We had some good discussion and prayer together.  He read a letter to us from a former inmate who is now in State Prison in Green Bay.  The man has let God change his life while in prison.  He has become and ordained pastor via correspondence courses.  He has four Bible Studies that he leads in his block.  Hearing of this has brought me GREAT inspiration!  I am anxious to see what God has in store for me.  I will need to keep my spiritual ears open so I can hear the Spirit's call.

One idea came to my mind.  Today, I received my first Canteen order:  Long underwear, M & M's, hard candy and of course, COFFEE!!  This is the most popular commodity in here.  Maybe I should open a coffee shop and call it "Jail Bucks"!!!  I'll have to work on that idea a little more.  I'm not sure the warden will like that.

Here is a funny story you might like to read.  I was asked if I play chess.  I responded that I have not played in a long time, so he would have to have extra patience with me.  He agreed so he began to chase my "royalty" right off the board.  (Christmas gift idea for Bryan:  book called "Chess for Inmates")  While he was taking all my "royalty", he asked if he could make a suggestion to me.  I willing accepted and he told me that I was simply "too nice".  He suggested that I be careful not to let others take advantage of me and that I should push back more.  I took this as a compliment and I thanked him for the suggestion.  Moments later, after talking about this, he overheard another inmate who was frustrated.  My chess partner stood up and went nose to nose with a rather heated exchange of those multi-purpose words.  They had quite the intensity and volume.  Eventually, they both realized that nobody was going to win so they backed down and we went back to playing our game.  Perhaps, he was just giving me an example of how I should behave!  That is simply not who I am.  I do not want to be conformed to this world.  I want to be a light in a dark place.  Pray for me that God will grant me wisdom and discernment while I am here.  It seems strange that God would put the least street-savvy person, like me, in a place that requires a degree of street smarts.  This can only mean that His power will be needed so that He will get the GLORY!

I will end this for now.  There will be many more, if the Lord wills.  May the grace of God and His Peace be with you.  Be STRONG and COURAGEOUS for the Lord.  -- McFreedom